Colour Me Greenwich

But no matter how much time I spent with him, the secret of my homosexuality still hurt. I was friends with him when the battle with my depression was beginning, which I did not know was happening at the time. My admiration of Matt was slowly turning to envy. I started thinking that I would never have the courage he did, that I would never be able to be who I wanted to be, and, worse, that I would have to carry my secret for the rest of my life. I cried in my car that day because all I had been hearing were the bad thoughts in my head. I cried because when I put the CD in all I heard was, “Live.” That is what Sigur Rós has been for me ever since. It could be Jónsi’s falsetto or the complex arrangements or how it just haunts you, but I really hear it all as a plea to keep living, because everything will be all right.